How To Accept Change

Melanie Green


white and red no smoking sign
white and red no smoking sign

It's safe to say we're all different, and of course, that's a good thing. Some of you 'go with the flow' and are spontaneous and love going out on those limbs. You fly by the seat of your pants and you're proud of it. Others, not so much. If you fall into the 'not so much' category, you have routines set in place for a reason and you like schedules and structure. Neither is wrong, but the latter often has a harder time accepting change. You are who I'll be addressing in this post!

I live with a kiddo who likes routine and structure. Been that way since he was a little kid. He liked eating the same thing every day, liked watching the same shows on a daily basis, and would absolutely freak out when something changed. As a parent, I felt like I shouldn't have to explain to my kid why our schedule or routine changed because that was a life skill that needed to be learned

Parent = authority. Kid = respect my authority and do what you're told.

There will be times in life when you will inevitably have a teacher, boss, coach, etc. tell you to do something and they expect you to do it without asking questions. It doesn't matter if you don't want to do it. Respect authority and just do it, unless of course it's immoral or goes against your beliefs and values.

Now that said kid is going to be a Senior in high school, he has embraced this concept. He's branched out and started trying new things, but let me tell you, the struggle was real. He had to routinely practice the art of trying new things. Of course, he had a gentle push from me, but he got to a point where he could acknowledge it.

I think we can all relate to keeping change at arm's length. It's kind of like going to a restaurant and ordering the same thing. It's wearing the same clothes week in and week out because it's what is comfortable. But being comfortable is what sometimes prevents us from trying new things and embracing change. Nothing stays the same and as I've grown up I'm definitely recognizing that. I now know why old people always talk about "back in the day" or "when I was young" because we often think our 'ways' are better than the present, and sometimes that might be true. I feel like the Progressive commercial where a bunch of younger adults are acting like their parents and they're in a group to help each other stop the process. I found myself just the other day telling my kids they should get outside more, back when I was their age I'd be riding my bike through the woods with my brother and not come home until it started getting dark. Can you feel the eye roll that consequently came from my kids? LOL

The best thing anyone can do is to keep an open mind. If you are so closed off and think your way is the only way then you are in for a miserable life. The whole "I'm right and you're wrong" concept isn't doing anyone any favors. It's closing you off from a world of possibilities.

There are so many adults that have this mindset and when I was in the classroom it was evident in my students as well! There were some students who could not stand to be wrong. They would throw tantrums and get so angry. This is what a lot of people don't understand about teachers. Teachers do not just teach a subject, they teach kids how to be good human beings because sometimes they are not being taught that at home. Part of being a good human is understanding change is constantly changing and will continue to do so throughout our lives, so it is important we know how to change. As a teacher, I always enjoyed the nurturing part of being responsible for a room full of kids in regards to making sure they would learn something, anything about how to be a good human being and stay true to themselves.

I'm not saying to change who you are or change your ideals, not at all. Understanding and having an open mind to learning that there might be better ways of doing something or a better way to be is the first step. Once my kiddo understood that concept, he wasn't so upset and didn't get worked up when other people were adamant they were right. It's that concept I tried to teach my students in the classroom, and it's that concept that parents should be teaching their kids by showing them and leading by example. Tolerance goes a long way. We need more kindness in the world and having an open mind and an open heart, well, it's a step in the right direction.

So, how do you accept change?
  1. Keep an open mind and an open heart.

  2. Understand things are always in motion and always fluid.

  3. When a possible change is thrust upon you, even when you don't like it, embrace it. Even if it's by taking baby steps. The tiniest step is always a step in the right direction.

  4. Have a hard time getting to the point where you are comfortable accepting change? Document. Journal. Keep track of your feelings and question why you feel that way. You might realize that you have no solid footing for being opposed to a specific change. If your answer to the question "Why do I feel this way?" is simply "because", then you need to dig deeper and if you can't find a valid reason...well...times they are a-changin'. ** Another reason you should journal is it allows you to track your progress! It's always motivating to see what changes you've made and how far you've come!

  5. Set new routines and new goals. This one is huge. Goals are a big thing with me, just ask any of my former students. You can't achieve something great unless you write out what you want to achieve and how you'll achieve it. Think of it like a treasure map. You're mapping your course to some great treasure. Now next I want you to get up and do your best Captain Jack Sparrow walking impersonation to get something to write with so you can plot your course!

So now that I've plotted a course for you, get going! Start right now, don't put it off. The sooner you start, the better off you will be! If you haven't already, head to my home page and subscribe so you don't miss out on any freebies! You can always follow me on social media by clicking the appropriate link below in my footer!